Wow, Im the normal daughter

theyre in the kitchen, drunk and talking about all of jamie's problems... they dont know shit about me. or about jamie for that matter. she smokes and still has depression. i need glasses and psychiatry but who cares about allie, allie's "normal". the normal one who if i cant get into MCC or the air force is going to shoot herself at graduation. i love my family, not a fucking clue in the world. summers coming im just gonna let them see my brands, i dont care anymore. they cant help me, junior year is almost over and im most likely gonna fail, but i dont give a shit. i dont really care about anything anymore except getting my fat ass up in the morning. all they ever cared about was her and thats the way itll always be. i care about her more than anything too, but i wish someone was on my side. all theyre talking about is the suicide "incident". what about my incident where i took a bottle of valium and didnt leave my room for 3 days. who gives a shit. fuck everyone and there self centered little worlds. im tired of caring for everyone but myself because i cant control my own life, but i can alter those of others. ill alter there lives when i shoot a bullet through my brain in a year, thatll alter there goddamn perfect world... i need a drink...

Mood: Thirsty

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