Funeral and such (cont.)
i never knew the yaskows and the kiepers were such good friends, but chelsea didnt cry... i didnt quote understand, but everyone deals with their stress differently, so i wont judge her. im still taking it really hard... after the ceremony we talked with wayne, rachel, and kev, then went back to alicias... i cant make myself happy anymore. dave haunts my dreams and i cant sleep. from friday to monday i got no sleep, but i slept tuesday and wednesday night, but i cant anymore. at times i feel responsible for his death, or that i took him for granted, or that i mistreated him in some way and how ill never get to say sorry or goodbye or how much i really did love you.... GOD DAMN IT! i bought a cross at kmart and after wearing it for one day i feel spiteful to the god that im not even sure exists. how could he do this to dave? "God broke our heart to prove to us, he only takes the best" is bullshit, im sorry. that is not acceptable, nor fair to anyone, especially dave. im just so frustrated right now... i cried so hard out of no where when i was drawing... i couldnt believe it. im goin to bed now. this is too much... my world has been torn apart.Labels: Save
contemplated existance at 9:36 PM
